Annoyance

[Guitarperson88]

Ok Look, I'm having this problem with a friend and fellow musician. He used to be my teacher until he left for berklee last january. He's cool and all, just he has a big ****ing ego. He also treats me like I'm inferior and whenever i tell him something i just learned he just blows it off, but expects me to gasp in aw when he tells me something he did. Well it's ticking me off and I would like to know a way to handle this. I know he's gonna see this post and that's the point, he visits these forums daily. So maybe he'll get a **** hint, but in other words, can i get some advice?

[salsainglesa]

I would say that if he is really your friend, he will notice that you care about him and your relationship. And if you are really his friend you can give him a chance for redemption!

[phantom]

hmm.. sounds like he might be a good guitarst but failed beeing a perfect teacher.
on the other side - he is not treading you like a student anymore, maybe it is more a competition between friends now. and as a friend it should be possible to tell him that you dislike his behavior.
sven

[EricV]

Hmmm... I usually try to find out why people act a certain way. When you said "whenever i tell him something i just learned he just blows it off" it made me think of something I noticed when I got back into teaching... sometimes you lose sight of how difficult basic things can be.
So for him it might not be such a big deal that you learned, say, a cool hammer-on lick, while for you, it´s a huge progress... maybe he deals with stuff that´s way harder on a daily base.

However, if there really is an ego-thing going on, if you feel hurt by the way he treats you, you should tell him. I guess you kinda did with your post, but maybe it´d be a good idea to honestly tell him in person.
I think if there really is a friendship going on, that friendship should last even if you honestly tell him what bothers you. And if you don´t, it might not be a friendship anymore for long.

And you shouldn´t feel inferior at all. Maybe he has a bit more experience, has been playing for a longer time, is a few years ahead of you. That doesn´t mean that you´re inferior. You´re on your way, if you keep going at it, you´ll be just as good, and you probably invest as much time, love and energy into your playing as he does. So you´re not inferior at all, you might just need a bit more time.
Hope this helps
Warm regards and good luck
Eric

NP: Steve Morse Band - Southern Steel

[Guitarperson88]

alright, thanks guys.

[oscardoo]

Most xcellent reply Eric
You always seem to sum things up perfectly...
cheers

[Caffeinated Cat]

I've got a friend like that too. He's a nice guy 99% of the time, but he's got sort of a big mouth and can say some annoying stuff. I just ignore him. I'll be his good friend five minutes from now, when he starts acting normal again, but when he gets on my nerves the only response I give him is "uh-huh" or whatever. It's obvious I'm just not paying any attention to him. And I'm not. I just think "oh, there he goes again" and don't even listen to what he's saying.

Maybe he'll take the hint someday, but in the meantime at least he doesn't bother me any more.