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As I am very new to this forum, I won't pretend to have followed this thread from the beginning but I think I can add a bit at least.
I've been playing in different bands for quite a few years (well 5, but considering my ripe old age of 20...). In the most current one, our front person is a girl whereas I was the frontman of the old band.
What I have learned over time is that there is absolutely no difference between a girl or a guy leading a band just so long as the person has drive and a leadership oriented personality. What I guess I'm saying is I think you just need to have a bit more confidence in your talents and the rest will follow!